Episode 6
Ep.6 150 year sentence and a deep spiritual journey part 1 w/ John Esteen
hey there,
I'm very excited to share my first interview with John Esteen
He is a truly inspiring individual for so many out there
in the face of tremendous hopelessness he was able to find the energy and focus needed to fight for his life !!
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Transcript
Hello, hello and welcome to the borealis
Unknown:experience. I'm your host Aurora, and I'm very excited to
Unknown:be sharing my first interview with john esteen. John esteen
Unknown:was sentenced to 150 years of jail time. And he shares his
Unknown:story. He shares how in a tremendously hopeless situation,
Unknown:he was able to fight for himself, he was able to see the
Unknown:light and to focus on the vision he has, namely to be reunited
Unknown:with his family and to live life and freedom. I find it very
Unknown:important to say that the Borealis experience podcast is
Unknown:not only about inspiring talks, and meditations, it is also
Unknown:inviting people from all walks of life to talk with me, and to
Unknown:share their story to inspire other people, to help them grow
Unknown:to help them make the changes they want to see in their life,
Unknown:and to relate to make you guys and girls out there. feel less
Unknown:alone. So feel inspired now lean back and enjoy this wonderful
Unknown:conversation I had with john as seen this morning. Take good
Unknown:care of yourself. By
Unknown:Okay, I'm John Esteen. I'm from Louisiana. I was served 20 years
Unknown:on 150 years sentence on a nonviolent drug offense. I was
Unknown:on NBC dateline covering my story. It was amazing story. And
Unknown:I like to share with others in hope to help somebody else in
Unknown:their life, maybe encourage them, inspire them do some
Unknown:positive in life, we have no doubt we never give up you can
Unknown:achieve your purpose in life. Also, I'm president and founder
Unknown:of Andy second when nonprofit organization and I'm very proud
Unknown:of and the purpose of that is to help those coming home and women
Unknown:to take the burden from them of the normal things that we have
Unknown:to accomplish when we come out that normal people said or
Unknown:citizens would do, like getting the license, transportation,
Unknown:mental health services, education and things of the
Unknown:like. And that's why I hope to in doing that. I hope to lower
Unknown:the recidivism rate, because people that come home from
Unknown:prison within two to five year span, they find themselves back
Unknown:in prison. And we want to curtail that. That's the purpose
Unknown:of that power station. Yes, ma'am.
Unknown:That is so so beautiful. Thank you, john. Like, would you say
Unknown:that when you come out of prison that like there's a lot of talk
Unknown:about PTSD, right posttraumatic stress disorder that people like
Unknown:all of them suffer from the stress that happens in the
Unknown:prison and to get back into life to get back to their families.
Unknown:Sounds very beautiful and romantic and it's awesome but
Unknown:it's also very scary and can bring up a lot of I don't know
Unknown:is it anger? Is it sadness is a depression How was it for you
Unknown:when you got out like it was a huge fight like legal fight to
Unknown:get you out on time to for you to not be serving over 100 years
Unknown:but the day you found out that you get out again How was it for
Unknown:you were you scared nervous or just excited
Unknown:and mixed it was a guess both excited in fear yeah excited to
Unknown:be know my family after so many years hand I'm having how it
Unknown:ended the house I can't be part of always long have that in
Unknown:dropped about then participate in that and now I'm having this
Unknown:opportunity when I was coming home so excited about that.
Unknown:Yeah, the fear thing is it's dealing with the potion medic
Unknown:stress disorder.
Unknown:Yeah.
Unknown:Thank you wouldn't you experience a lot of things in
Unknown:prison also you're in a controlled environment for so
Unknown:many years. So you depend on you find out depended on a system to
Unknown:a certain extent, your life you know, you when you wake up you
Unknown:go to bed Yeah, he, in the light things that the light, every
Unknown:moment of your life is pretty much controlled. And you have a
Unknown:sense of freedom in Angola because it's like a city of his
Unknown:own. But at the same time, you'll find out that you are in
Unknown:a controlled environment, we'd be lucky out put you in a
Unknown:dungeon, and things like that. And reality really sets in. So
Unknown:you're really not really, really not free, even though it might
Unknown:feel as though the environment might feel like a free book by
Unknown:actual ality and not sort of fear me coming home. The things
Unknown:that your customer customers are doing in prison. These habits
Unknown:you're gonna develop, you find yourself students still doing
Unknown:these things when you're home.
Unknown:Yeah, I'm certain
Unknown:to you. Like I go to a hospital. If I go to an appointment,
Unknown:instead of me saying appointment, I will say call up.
Unknown:So had to get over there took me a while to get over the sand. I
Unknown:have a call out and people looking at me call out. It's a
Unknown:call out. Excuse me. I'm I mean appointment. You see, you know,
Unknown:I mean, that things, the small things like that, you know, you
Unknown:realize that it's been ingrained. You've been
Unknown:institutionalized. Yeah, not knowing it. So that's a
Unknown:psychological thing about it. You know, you, you find yourself
Unknown:doing things not really noticing that you're doing it. So some I
Unknown:pointed out to you. Yes, ma'am.
Unknown:Yeah. And while you were serving, you say serving? Were
Unknown:you a spiritual person before? Already? And it helped you
Unknown:through? Or did you have a moment in jail where you started
Unknown:praying or started having like, mental practices to to not go
Unknown:crazy to stay sane? Did you grow up in a religious in a spiritual
Unknown:family? Or did you learn over time, too, because you come
Unknown:across as a very, very grounded, like, sweet soul person?
Unknown:Well, um, you know, surprise me by saying that a lot of people
Unknown:even in prison security guards in inmates are like, what was
Unknown:telling you don't belong here, man. You different, you know,
Unknown:you see, you know, they see the lighting, you may know what
Unknown:you're doing here. So I hear that a lot. And I grew up in a
Unknown:beautiful household, Catholic household, grew up Roman
Unknown:Catholic, went to Catholic schools. I went all the way up
Unknown:to my temporary year, my junior senior went to public schools by
Unknown:choice. And I want to go into Nicholls State University to
Unknown:play football. By switching schools are kind of like last
Unknown:educational platform, pretty much the same. I mean by that is
Unknown:that I didn't have college preparatory courses, get a full
Unknown:scholarship to college. So that led me to make another bad
Unknown:decision in my life, which I call bad decision is to join the
Unknown:National Guard to offset the costs to go to college. I've got
Unknown:a partial scholarship for football, and I needed something
Unknown:else to pay for the rest. So I'll say when we go National
Unknown:Guard, it sounds good. And they pay the rest, which it works. It
Unknown:works for the for the most part, but I didn't know that would be
Unknown:employed to go to war while in college. So that kind of
Unknown:backfired on me. Yeah, that derailed my dream to being
Unknown:playing in the Football League once in one day, you know, so
Unknown:always I still think about it day if I wouldn't went to the
Unknown:war. What I what I made it to the NFL, so I still go to my
Unknown:mind.
Unknown:Yeah, so feelings of regret. And yeah, maybe anger towards
Unknown:yourself. And where were you sent to war?
Unknown:Saturday again, ask that again. Ma'am.
Unknown:Where would you send To sir?
Unknown:I was sent to Saudi Arabia. Dharan. Okay in 19 9091. I got
Unknown:there with just turn on one. Well, it was it was it was the
Unknown:war was pretty quick at the site. And when we were being
Unknown:bombed, and we had to sit in these annex courts were no
Unknown:windows can see what's going on. So you don't know if the bombs
Unknown:gonna hit you or not. But all you hear sirens going off and
Unknown:heading to chemical Sudan because they didn't want to
Unknown:shore up their chemicals in the water here is that was been
Unknown:blowing up exposing their Senate to was our way. And that alone,
Unknown:I got tired. I got to the point where I just like, say, forget
Unknown:about it, then do it all this time, no chemicals and why would
Unknown:they have it now and I stopped putting my chemical suit on. But
Unknown:that was short lived because the guys that was in the annex court
Unknown:would mean they kind of came together and talk to me say man
Unknown:put your chemical suit on, we think we should put it on
Unknown:persuading people My Chemical shoe back on. And but at that
Unknown:point, I felt like that was the turning point in my mental
Unknown:factors. At that moment, because I didn't care anymore. It didn't
Unknown:matter. I always, always was thinking my family. Something
Unknown:happened to me here. You know, how am I my future wife,
Unknown:daughter, my son, my mom and dad, people that loved me always
Unknown:put my mind I was contact them. Not knowing if I'm gonna go home
Unknown:again. I got tired of that. You know, so I just cut just cut
Unknown:everything off. At that moment right there. I snapped. Yeah,
Unknown:yes, ma'am.
Unknown:and for how long? Have you been away from home then?
Unknown:Well, at that time, I was like seven and a half months have
Unknown:gone. by seven and a half months. I was over there.
Unknown:And then you came back home.
Unknown:I came back home had to be like June, July, maybe august of 91.
Unknown:And when I came home, I worked for my mother, my mother, lady
Unknown:who owns racetrack Jepson downs and the fairgrounds. And we did
Unknown:like beautification there. We did mess with plants with plant
Unknown:plants and no shrubberies. And that was really my first real
Unknown:job that I really had. Yeah, other than then I became a
Unknown:killer in the race grind were sold tickets and racehorse
Unknown:tickets and stuff like that. Yeah, so I got rid of das. I
Unknown:stopped doing that when I got when I know. That was pretty
Unknown:cool. No, that was really I was kind of like, and see that will
Unknown:live. Shortly after that. I was I was late to my first time
Unknown:getting convicted, going to the feds. Um, see, I had a lot of
Unknown:pressure on me. I really couldn't cope. I really would
Unknown:think more pressure Come on me. I kind of like I get disturbed
Unknown:real bad. You know, I feel I can't cope. What the average the
Unknown:average thing and I couldn't stand nobody challenged in me
Unknown:mentally. This is a lot of things that this I couldn't I
Unknown:couldn't want to buy tell me anything. Yeah, it was
Unknown:especially my own mind. I'm thinking I'm writing my own
Unknown:things my time otherwise, I really kind of it balls my
Unknown:blood. So when I got to the point where I felt that thing
Unknown:was coming, like financially speaking, you know, I had a
Unknown:number to a friend of mine that was in a drug game. And he said,
Unknown:whenever you pay me Just call me you know, come holla at me, but
Unknown:he said that because initially I refused him, even though he
Unknown:showed me all kinds of money. But I was working at the time
Unknown:for my mom, girlfriend. My sisters was like a family thing.
Unknown:So but eventually I got into it and that to the point work just
Unknown:started my my crime spree. You know if you want to call it
Unknown:that, but I really believe that it all stems coming from war
Unknown:because I was doing a lot of stuff in Saudi Arabia. That
Unknown:along with me, and I came back to the state side like we was
Unknown:going through to get to a place called Bahrain. I'm not if you
Unknown:familiar Bahrain, Bahrain, sell alcohol. Yeah. NCO clothes,
Unknown:people go potty. You can drink alcohol in this part of the
Unknown:country. Yeah, we drive a lot. Yeah. So I wasn't sorry. I
Unknown:wasn't where's the drown counties? No, alcohol. Alcohol
Unknown:is illegal. Yeah, so when we do it, what we did is we started
Unknown:with that great idea we young to stop smuggling alcohol across
Unknown:the border and make extra money. So that story low hanging with
Unknown:me right there. And other things, you know, of the like,
Unknown:you know, doing things that we've posed to be doing. And
Unknown:when I came home, and that was easy for me getting to doing
Unknown:things continued doing things I was supposed to be doing. And
Unknown:that was selling Yeah, without drugs introduced to Minnesota.
Unknown:stuff called hashish. Yeah, they will have enough that ends up
Unknown:there with some ndo. You know, we came in, introduced that to
Unknown:my soldier. Comrades and, and I was smoking that we were
Unknown:drinking moonshine with the color rice wine. Man was doing
Unknown:everything. And one time. I mean, I was introduced to a lot
Unknown:of stuff that never was introduced to my life.
Unknown:Yeah, yeah. And it was also like you had a feeling of being a
Unknown:provider and helping people cope with a stress, right? Because
Unknown:alcohol helps you to, yes, process stress, and, of course,
Unknown:a solution, but it's a short term relief. And that's what you
Unknown:were able to provide to those guys. And all along, you forget,
Unknown:oh, shit, this is highly illegal. Actually, I shouldn't
Unknown:be doing that.
Unknown:Right, you know? Exactly. You know, we know what was doing
Unknown:wrong. But we didn't see that's another thing. We'll know what
Unknown:he did wrong, but they don't know what the consequences are
Unknown:behind the wrong things that you do. Yeah, you see, we haven't.
Unknown:Once you know, the consequences, I think you make a new, more
Unknown:rational decision to do it or not. You see this, like, when I
Unknown:went to prison the first time, you know, I have got three and a
Unknown:half years, and I come home. And my first time that was a lot, I
Unknown:would expect them probation. So that blew my mind. Right there.
Unknown:See, and when I was doing my time in Pensacola, Florida, so I
Unknown:come home from that, you kind of straighten me out, I won't go
Unknown:back to jail. But I wouldn't change or wanting to change
Unknown:person is just I got older and wiser. But I was still the same
Unknown:person that made those bad decisions prior to going to
Unknown:jail. You know, just want to understand why I'm mad. And so
Unknown:it was for somebody to come along us that's doing something
Unknown:illegal make some extra money for me to go back into that
Unknown:trap. And that's what happened. On his second challenge. Yeah.
Unknown:Okay. And as I got into it, I'm not I'm not thinking about the
Unknown:consequences. I know jail is a consequence, but not that much
Unknown:time. Not that much jail time. 150 years, I never fathom that.
Unknown:in my wildest dreams. No, I hurt anybody. Yeah. So um, so what
Unknown:they did is, by me being a second Fender, they couldn't
Unknown:give me life. So they gave me full count in random consecutive
Unknown:it separately from one another. So give me the most time
Unknown:possible. So let's say example with me. And what Another thing
Unknown:I was angry about is that you send me all this time, nothing
Unknown:consideration that I fall for my country. The banks that did good
Unknown:and like what I was doing well with Andrew, prior to all this,
Unknown:like playing football trying to provide for my family. Hello,
Unknown:son. None of these things will take into consideration and my
Unknown:senesin if they did, would you have gave me 100 years flat, you
Unknown:know, my time consecutive for you ran together. Give me a
Unknown:break there, you know, that you could done that because it still
Unknown:fits to our sentencing guideline. But you don't want me
Unknown:you know, and that kind of still angers me to to think about my
Unknown:country will allow something like this to happen.
Unknown:Yeah, yeah. And just to give us a quick idea, so you ended up
Unknown:having to serve 20 years out of
Unknown:how many years? Seven months? Yeah. 20 years, seven months,
Unknown:man. And that's because I fought. That's because I fought.
Unknown:Yeah, my word is laid down. On the last change. I have pro
Unknown:eligibility, but it's not guaranteed. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I
Unknown:can do I can still be in prison right now waiting on another
Unknown:time turn for parole eligibility going on. I have friends and it
Unknown:still it has proved eligibility because they're juveniles and
Unknown:got denied and had to wait another two years and then you
Unknown:got to wait another five years. It's got denied again. It just
Unknown:is an ongoing thing. Now promises and how to get on my
Unknown:own.
Unknown:Sorry.
Unknown:No, I didn't want it. That's why I took it off. Yeah, okay. No
Unknown:problem. No, that's why I took it upon myself to fight. Even
Unknown:though I have row. I'm still fighting to get the sentence.
Unknown:Yeah, because my sentence was a league in a court and our system
Unknown:was saying that I had to go into pro upon rollaboard and I will
Unknown:tell you the system that how do I have to go on upon parole
Unknown:board to ask for a favor? Well, my sentence is illegal. And it
Unknown:should be do me should earn that extra for famous upon Robo. You
Unknown:just ask for favor. So I'm asking them to read to resend me
Unknown:to give me my life sentence as all our accent and they will
Unknown:fuse in that. And I fought and I fought and I fought until my
Unknown:case became the SDN case. Now it's a big old case landmark
Unknown:case now. And many people went home on my case before I even
Unknown:went home. So I was still fighting when people going home
Unknown:on using my case. Yes, but
Unknown:that's okay. That's okay to help others. Is that
Unknown:Yes, right. Love it. I would love it. You know, I just had to
Unknown:fight longer.
Unknown:Yeah, I'm
Unknown:good day, the day you found out that you got 150 years to serve.
Unknown:When? When were you mentally okay to start a fight? Did you
Unknown:fight from the first day like you didn't accept it from the
Unknown:first day? Or did you first go through a couple of years, a
Unknown:couple months where you were like, Oh, my God, like, I'm
Unknown:done. I'm lost. I got nowhere to go. Um, how long did it take you
Unknown:to start fighting?
Unknown:Me a few years now took me a few years still fighting. When I
Unknown:first got the end goal and go like a two year early. It's like
Unknown:a city of his own had a lot of distractions that sports have
Unknown:everything you'd think of. And the world and society, you
Unknown:pretty much have it in prison. And so that was my distractions.
Unknown:I love sports. So that was my that was my way of since I have
Unknown:couldn't have drugs or alcohol or know that. So sports,
Unknown:provided that that comfort for me. Yes, going through I was
Unknown:going through this and educate myself to always want to learn,
Unknown:I want to learn by guys so I've gotten a Bible College. I got my
Unknown:bachelor's degree in Christian ministry and what the harder
Unknown:Carter school and now after after Bible college and I got
Unknown:served certified horticultural certificate. So I did do pa
Unknown:became vice president of vets club, I did this like that. I
Unknown:was always in positive things. I was a boxer. I was in a boxing
Unknown:team, football team basketball team, you name it, I done it.
Unknown:Yeah. And I got to the point where Yeah, I got to the point
Unknown:where I still have 150 years. And no, no one no one had dawned
Unknown:on me is when I got no color guard, by me being a military
Unknown:and veterans club, they asked me being a color guard. And we do
Unknown:we do a little show and rodeo town have rodeo twice a year and
Unknown:we come into the color guard and Buddha flag thing you know, do a
Unknown:little show for the people and and one and also we bury our own
Unknown:veterans we bury them at the core point Point Lookout is a
Unknown:burial ground on Angola premises. And we got we're up
Unknown:two Point Lookout three now the ground at the end of all is
Unknown:people dying in there it's a lie it's reality is real. So I don't
Unknown:know this guy's older white guy that went to very and his family
Unknown:never couldn't afford to get them I'm assuming. But his
Unknown:sister and her husband was there at the funeral got a big old
Unknown:hole in the ground we around it we do a little ceremony and I'm
Unknown:watching this coffin go into the big black dog hole. And and I
Unknown:felt like I felt the guy's pain. And I started crying tears come
Unknown:on my face. And in my my heart in my mind. I said I don't want
Unknown:to die here. I woke me up that start that sparked me to fight
Unknown:for my life. That's when I start cutting things off. You know
Unknown:there was there will hold me up from getting my freedom. I
Unknown:stopped cut these dead branches off and started focusing on a
Unknown:law. Talk to me a counsels trying to get information. And
Unknown:it is click one day like God gave me the answer my case and I
Unknown:tried to get other inmate counsel understand none and
Unknown:couldn't understand what I was talking about. That is new. I
Unknown:had it and I had one inmate that that believed in me because I
Unknown:was so adamant and so persuasive on and confident that this won't
Unknown:work for me. And we and he worked out he worked my routes
Unknown:out for me year after year after year we stuck with the same
Unknown:claim. And eventually I got the reward to go take a while.
Unknown:Yeah, but from that one instance where you woke up, your whole
Unknown:being focus just on I want to be free. And I envision what I want
Unknown:to see in my future. And I'm not going to let myself distracted
Unknown:anymore.
Unknown:I mess with the women and whatnot when I guys when we meet
Unknown:the sisters, whatever I say, No, I can't offer them nothing.
Unknown:Yeah, I see, they are there. I mean, here, what can I do for
Unknown:them? See, I need to educate myself, I need to find my way
Unknown:out of here, wherever, by where everything is, then I can
Unknown:concentrate on that. Yeah, see, so that was my focus. Yeah. And,
Unknown:and let everybody tell you and, and I did meet, I did meet, um,
Unknown:my future wife, my last two years of conservation, I didn't
Unknown:meet her. Um, and it was a, it was like, reason being is
Unknown:because I finished all I had to do my case is all lose weight.
Unknown:Because this is my I was my second term around second time
Unknown:around to the Louisiana Supreme Court, I was denied their first
Unknown:time there. And this is my like, to me, it was my last hope. And
Unknown:I've been there a statement like 17 months waiting on a decision.
Unknown:And in and in that time, a friend of mine has run a yard
Unknown:where we're really close with him. But we got to develop a
Unknown:friendship out there who worked out together in and got to know
Unknown:him very well. And he stopped me one day and he said, he said man
Unknown:you talk to you about so I say What's up? My wife is bring a
Unknown:friend. And I know you don't move yet. Nobody family. All
Unknown:right. No, there's so they already know. I don't I don't do
Unknown:that. You say but I was thinking I was sitting on my bed. And I
Unknown:was wondering who can visit with my wife best friend that
Unknown:convinced come spend time with my wife. And he said as I was
Unknown:laying on my bed. So someone told me Let boosting become my
Unknown:nickname. I grow as my nickname let boosting, talk to her. And
Unknown:when he presented that to me like that, I looked at my smile
Unknown:said okay, I go visit you know what you and I'll talk to you
Unknown:why friend why you spend time with your wife. I do that for
Unknown:you. So I went so I was really working out really finished
Unknown:everything in which is not a date. So I don't care who she is
Unknown:as big as a whale ugly is I don't know what it didn't
Unknown:matter.
Unknown:So
Unknown:I just went there, you know, with no expectations and this
Unknown:free, you know, cuz it just, I'm just doing a favor. That's all I
Unknown:was doing, you know, so. But what got me when I met a shoe,
Unknown:she's pretty attractive young lady, you know, to me, but I was
Unknown:just talking to her, you know, I got to meet her personally and
Unknown:get to know the guy's wife, you know, that the meet her too. And
Unknown:we go and visit was a long visit that day. You know, that
Unknown:morning, I went to four o'clock that evening. So visit hotel you
Unknown:buy for you. This is like a regular visiting. And anyway,
Unknown:like a day in a park. You know, so that's how we treated it. And
Unknown:but what got me was at the end of the visit. She walked towards
Unknown:me. And I was sitting down. I remember like she can't walk and
Unknown:she asked me a question. She said, Do you want me to come
Unknown:back? And I said, Wow. I say See, I know what to say. I said
Unknown:you won't come back. And she said she's Uh, yeah, I say we
Unknown:come I want you to come back. So from that day forward, she one
Unknown:of my business issues, I was a joint venture with them on the
Unknown:guys visit, I was just a joint this joint in with these visits,
Unknown:we got paperwork done for that. And about a month or two later,
Unknown:we wound up getting her on my visit and less and she came
Unknown:like, twice a month to drove like, to Ohio two hours, two and
Unknown:a half hours. Twice a month. They come see me, you know, I
Unknown:mean? Wow. I mean, so not knowing that, you know, I have
Unknown:150 years. Yeah. And not knowing if I'm come home and I can't I'm
Unknown:not sure. You know, I'm not sure right now, because I'm still in
Unknown:court and I'm still waiting on this decision. been long time in
Unknown:court. So it's like, last time I was in court this at the same
Unknown:time and I got denied so I wouldn't I know what to think.
Unknown:Yeah, but always but for my no my key was I learned I tapped
Unknown:into something spiritual. I tapped into something very,
Unknown:very, may benefit a lot of people while by hand is right
Unknown:now I'm gonna tell you I decided to just get up two o'clock every
Unknown:morning on one bed whereby sleep and kneel by my bed, my hands up
Unknown:like that. And just praise God for who he is not accident from
Unknown:nothing is banking them in advance for what blessings He
Unknown:bestowed upon me. And they're there every night for about the
Unknown:last two years of my time in Angola. And as a result of all
Unknown:that, I see many doors opening I seen first a newspaper reporter
Unknown:came in there and interviewed me. He wrote for the advocate
Unknown:newspaper here in New Orleans. He interviewed me and he put me
Unknown:he took pictures on me in a law library. He's amazed by my
Unknown:story. I'm going after him, NBC dateline candidate, Dr. Mineral
Unknown:and gola, not me on Angola. And they discover my story when it
Unknown:came to Angola, so they call me to the warden's office and tell
Unknown:them telling me NBC dateline here want to interview you. Wow,
Unknown:that blew me away. Big time from me. Yes. And and I wanna go and
Unknown:getting the sentence. Long story short, one can't get the
Unknown:sentence and I went back to my judicial one my case and we
Unknown:asked me for after 17 years well my case I go to my district
Unknown:court to give me sentence the judge is a new judge. And she
Unknown:refused to look at my mitigating factors last 20 years in prison
Unknown:she refused even look at me actually. All she said is that
Unknown:we all breach our boundaries that we're here for sentencing
Unknown:not here for upon parole board. Like now she has real heart nose
Unknown:and blood.
Unknown:And
Unknown:she sent us me to the max possible. So 150 years turned to
Unknown:100 years. So all she knocked off was 50 years of my senate
Unknown:and sent me back then goal. Okay, so now I'm back at Angola.
Unknown:All I have nice hope is for all which I really want depend upon.
Unknown:So that's my that's my guess, was my eternal but at the same
Unknown:time, I had a lot of publicity at this moment, too. So either I
Unknown:can go for me, or it's gonna go against me. And I'm praying that
Unknown:it go from me. At the same time, keep in mind that I'm still
Unknown:praising God every morning at two o'clock in the morning, just
Unknown:for who he is. And that will kept me straight kept me strong
Unknown:kept me focused. Yeah, because I know that I was fairly convinced
Unknown:that if God wouldn't be who can be against me, I kept that in my
Unknown:heart. Yes. And so now on NBC dateline got involve, they come
Unknown:in and they come in my dog asleep, they fill me in there.
Unknown:They if they bring me to my chapel, I forget the film I
Unknown:worked at in prison. I'm like a free man already in prison. I'm
Unknown:walking around with these people with the wardens and everything.
Unknown:Yeah, this is you know, and and it comes to my parole hearing. I
Unknown:got it. Like my role was speeded up some kind of way. I don't
Unknown:know how but I was on a board came up quick. So everybody
Unknown:wanted me out of there. Yeah, the system wanted me out there.
Unknown:And I'm not seeing it at the time do I'm still nervous.
Unknown:guys understand
Unknown:you're nervous. I'm still nervous. I'm NBC dateline city
Unknown:on come back and they gonna walk me to the pump roll boy being a
Unknown:walk new came to my door earlier that morning before going proper
Unknown:oh boy the filming you won't be watching my thoughts. They won't
Unknown:know what I'm thinking. They won't know everything about me
Unknown:prior to me going to that point robot parent family up they
Unknown:already waiting. And the other guys up there waiting for the
Unknown:parole hearings. I was a second person they go in there right
Unknown:No, not taking take note of this not the first person was denied.
Unknown:Oh my god. So you know how it was. I had a bad on my mind. God
Unknown:on standby, no witness, you know, first guy was denied off.
Unknown:So he come out he come out family crying, he crying and I
Unknown:see. So he are going to call me up. Going there. Hold a dome for
Unknown:my family. Come on and sit down and make a long story short
Unknown:son's book funny my mama spoke for me. They asked me a few
Unknown:questions. And that this the lawyer for the state of
Unknown:Louisiana was the first one to question me on a board. And he
Unknown:told me he let me know that he is a lawyer. And he won't ask me
Unknown:a few questions. So he asked me a few questions and after asked
Unknown:him, he said, it must be true. They say about you. He said, You
Unknown:fought us, despite how we may have felt about you. You kept on
Unknown:fighting. He said, therefore, I cannot deny you. And the other
Unknown:two guys up two guys spoke they asked me a few questions. And he
Unknown:said we liked the first guy we can't can't deny. So, so many
Unknown:methods original guy that talked to me first a lawyer. When you
Unknown:say well, granted parole may in my head hit the table. cry like
Unknown:a baby.
Unknown:Yeah.
Unknown:Yes, that was the best time in my life. That I have so much
Unknown:weight on my shoulders now has been lifted.
Unknown:Yeah. So beautiful. JOHN, so we're coming to an end with with
Unknown:our first meeting here. I would love to have you back. And you
Unknown:also mentioned that you want to bring on a friend. Right?
Unknown:Yes, yeah. See, he's, um, okay.
Unknown:No, I don't know. Because zoom is gonna kick us out here very
Unknown:soon. That you know, it's zoom. It's not me. One. Okay. All
Unknown:right. Would you like to mention your podcast right at the end
Unknown:here. And then we set up a new date for our new conversation,
Unknown:maybe next week, or in a couple of days. I'm gonna share the
Unknown:title of your podcast that you want to kick start.
Unknown:The title of my podcast I want to kick start is out of bondage
Unknown:and to success.
Unknown:Yeah. And this episode here will be on the Borealis experience,
Unknown:podcast. And yeah, we will chat very soon to talk about your
Unknown:friend to bring him on. And to talk more about your situation
Unknown:right now and
Unknown:your family.
Unknown:Right. Yes. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for your time
Unknown:and for. Yeah, for being here. Thank you. Pleasure. Have a good
Unknown:rest of your day.
Unknown:You too, man.
Unknown:Thank you so much. Bye, bye.
Unknown:Bye.
Unknown:Thank you so much for listening to our conversation here on the
Unknown:Warriors experience podcast. Make sure to check out john
Unknown:Astin on Facebook and his non profit organization that I will
Unknown:be posting in the show notes here. Alright. Take good care of