Ep. 36 Life will force you onto your knees... [self awareness]

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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora.

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And I'm very happy to be spending some time with you

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today.

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First off, I want to apologize for not posting my episode as

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usual on Thursday.

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I had kind of an emergency yesterday

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and was not able to show up and tense back pain

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to the point that I was not able to breathe properly anymore,

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held me back.

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And

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I'm slowly but surely healing and taking really good care of

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myself.

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And I thought Yeah, first thing I want to do, once I have a

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little more power, again, is to be there for you, and share with

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you what I'm learning because I know, in sharing this, I might

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am might be able to help you.

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And

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I can show up as authentically as I want. And that's going to

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help me heal as well.

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I think I was living under the impression that the more good I

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was doing in the world,

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the less likely

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I will be hurt or disappointed or attacked by people.

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And for the same reason. So thinking that if I do good in

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the work world,

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I also don't have to, yeah, really stand up for myself.

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I can avoid

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weird,

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uncomfortable situations because I just want goodness in my life.

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But in doing so I totally neglected myself, I was not

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there for myself, I just kept putting work and content out

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there thinking that I'm kind of paying into my health account.

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But I was not. I was Yeah, doing an out of balance.

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And now I'm paying the price.

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Life will force you on to your knees and make you learn these

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lessons.

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Take care of yourself first. Make yourself a priority. And

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you're not going to be selfish, you're going to be authentic,

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you're going to be able to speak your truth and make people see

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you understand you. Setting a boundary with someone doesn't

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mean that you want to shut them out of your life. It means that

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you give them a manual on how to treat you.

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And I share this with people I preach this I beg people to take

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care of this and focus on this

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yet at the same time. I don't do it for myself.

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And that's really concerning.

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In German we say the dentist has the most crooked and ugly teeth

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right they see what they can fix and do and the other and how to

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serve others but they kind of neglect themselves.

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Of course not every dentist has crooked teeth but I think you

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know what I'm trying to say here

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so yeah, I'm slowly but

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surely you're recovering here

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my

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house practice you know my little rituals that I engaged

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in. I also did in a in a resentful way kind of Yeah, I

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have to go for this walk now I have to take care of my physical

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health.

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And I kind of abused myself into these habits to be healthy.

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What the fuck was I thinking that that's going to keep me

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healthy? No on a mental emotional level. I'm abusing

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myself and my body may be to

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to some degree.

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So self care is really a tricky

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Saying,

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a thing that we have to learn to integrate in life and to not

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practice it in an abusive way.

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So yeah, I'm learning these very valuable lessons right now.

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And

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I'm just, yeah, very bad pain and my back is just

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forcing me onto my knees and forcing me to look at where I

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was not assertive, where I didn't speak up for myself.

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And I know the situations now. And I know that in those

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situations, I had physical pain. Mentally, I just had these sorts

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of I need to escape, I need to run away, I need to make the

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stop.

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But acts externally, I didn't act, I didn't do anything, I

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didn't do anything to make the shitty situation stop. So like a

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sponge, I kept inhaling

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that toxic energy. And now it accumulated inside of me. And

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I'm dealing with that pain. And I think that's what I'm supposed

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to learn. I'm supposed to learn to stand up for myself to not

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expect my partner or anybody else around me to do it for me,

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I have to do it for myself. I have to feel the self worth.

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And then stand up for myself.

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And know that it is going to improve my relationships and not

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destroy them, because I think that's what I'm scared.

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I'm scared that if I show up authentically, if I start

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setting boundaries, that I'm going to piss people off that I

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have to deal with their resentment and pain.

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But if I learned to communicate my boundaries in a gentle way,

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I can go to bed at night peacefully.

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And know that any weird reaction is like from the other side from

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the other party is not going to say anything about me, but about

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them.

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So

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sometimes a coach needs a coach.

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If you are connected with me on Facebook, he probably saw that

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little video of mine. If we haven't connected there yet,

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please join me there. I would love to connect with you on a

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deeper level. I love to know where my listeners are from and

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if ever you have a topic request, don't hold back and you

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just message me there. Aurora Eggert coaching or just Aurora

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Eggert. And you're more than welcome to message me, I usually

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get back to people.

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Once they let me know that they listen to my podcast and they

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want to comment or share something about their lives.

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Also,

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I'm being very vulnerable with you.

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It is a

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it is

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how do you say

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I have to overcome resistance for sure. Before I'm being that

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vulnerable because I thought, I'm a life coach. Now. I can't

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feel that way. I have to be strong, I have to be a leader.

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But I figured that I want to create connection with you. I

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want you to trust me and to know that I'm not hovering somewhere

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above you. I'm right there with you.

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And I'm sure I can learn tons of things from you.

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And that's what I'm learning right now with my coaching

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clients is that yeah, they learn from me, I provide them all the

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tools they need and I serve them

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to the best of my abilities, but I also learned so much about

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life and about myself and it's just a beautiful journey to be

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on.

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So if you feel like you're ready for a coaching session, don't

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hold back for 60 minutes are for free. And it's it's incredible

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what we can

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unlock when it comes to a potential

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It is incredible how we can experience a little shift of

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perspective within one session. And it can change our lives. And

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as

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Yeah, I feel very blessed and grateful to be working as a

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coach, it gives me so much and it excites me to see other

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people grow and flourish.

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Alright, if you haven't subscribed yet, subscribe to my

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podcast here. And if you want to leave me feedback, a review on

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a space of recharging your batteries.

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Alright, I will take really good care of myself now. Please do

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the same. Until next time. Bye