Ep.34 When you don't know what to do with yourself.

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Hello, hello, and

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welcome to the Borealis experience. I'm your host

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Aurora. And I'm very happy to be spending some time with you

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today. Today's episode is for you. When you don't know what to

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do with yourself. I feel COVID has brought that feeling upon

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us. And maybe even before COVID is sometimes felt like my

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parents are busy, my siblings are busy, my friends are busy,

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my partner is busy, my kids are busy. I have time to myself, but

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I don't really want to sit with myself. See, when you feel like

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you don't know what to do with yourself, it means that you

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don't really like to spend time with yourself. It's also a big

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clue showing us and showing yourself that you might be

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distracting yourself from yourself with socializing, video

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games, porn, movie watching, binge eating, whatever you

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choose to do. Some people are very sporty and healthy. But all

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they're really doing is running away from that loneliness. That

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is eating them up from the inside. And then once you've

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done your exercise, once you've eaten your healthy food and

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nobody has time for you. You watched all the movies, you read

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all the books, wait, you're not peaceful, calm enough to read

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books yet. But once you've done all the things that distract you

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from yourself, and you maybe even exhausted, you sit with

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yourself and it feels so uncomfortable. It doesn't feel

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good at all. You have thoughts creeping up, you have memories

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coming up. You have fears coming up when it comes to the future.

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And it just doesn't feel right to be sitting alone.

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Maybe it's a beautiful, sunny Saturday. Maybe it's a Monday

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afternoon. I don't know how your life looks like. But I sure know

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how it feels when you don't know what to do with yourself. Set

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out what I like to do when I feel that way. As just be in it.

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And you will see that what you running away from is not that

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scary anymore. And if it is, then you know that you can

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always reach out. You can always find a counselor you can always

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talk to your parents, your friends, acquaintances,

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Facebook, there's several groups that can support you with

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whatever it is. If you don't feel okay with yourself. If it's

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too intense, too uncomfortable, but if you think you can bear

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with it just a second, just a couple minutes with me here. So

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know that you're not alone. And feeling that way is perfectly

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fine. We've all done stuff that we regret. We've all made

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mistakes. We all feel like a failure at times. And really

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life is not about not feeling these things. Life is about

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feeling these things. And being step by step more okay with

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those feelings. If you're driving, keep your eyes open Of

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course or if you're operating machinery or your attention as

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needed. But if you're at home if you may be laying down on your

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couch or your bed. I invite you to close your eyes and that

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feeling of not being enough for yourself. That feeling Have, I

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need something from the outside? That makes me feel whole and

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Okay, something that distracts me from the thing that is eating

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me up from the inside is a very common feeling we all feel. So I

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think the first step is to know that you're not alone in this.

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And the second step is to find out what kind of feeling is it

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be excited to explore it? Is it anger? Is it grief? Is it

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resentment? Is it fear? What is the feeling that is so

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uncomfortable? When you spend time with yourself reserved Your

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thoughts? Or your thoughts? destructive? Negative, fear

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driven, ego driven? What is it that you reject so much about

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yourself? What is it that you still can't embrace about

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yourself? Do you constantly have to be in the doing? Can you

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never really be in the being? Are you constantly afraid

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something will happen? Some thought will creep up on you

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some memory.

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Take a deep breath. focus in on your breath. And know that what

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you experiences was part of human condition. It is part of

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life. And especially during COVID know that so many people

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are going through the same thing. We all don't know what's

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gonna happen. uncertainty for some is exciting. But for most

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of us, it's crippling and just scary. Know that you will be

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fine. Know that the most important thing is to get to

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know yourself. And what you're doing right now I'm so proud of

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you is to get to know yourself. What is your drive? to do

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things? Is it fear? Is it resentment? Is it distraction or

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as it compassion, empathy, wanting to support others. And

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you will very quickly find out in which stream you are

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swimming. And from there, you can go and evaluate. Am I

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swimming in the right direction right now? How can I get closer

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to my purpose to what I came here to do? You know, this life

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is so beautiful and rich and fulfilling. But the world we

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live in is so scary and fast paced, but also very diverse. So

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if you are a dreamer, you can dream up the perfect job for

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yourself. And I'm sure that you will either create that job or

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it is out there already. And you just got to find the right

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people. If you are a very skeptical, fear driven person,

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then I invite you to dream a little more. And to really

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explore what excites you what makes you feel good. What are

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you good at? And maybe if you don't find anything that you're

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really good at? You haven't found it yet, inside of

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yourself. You haven't explored yourself enough. Because we all

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have a purpose here. And most of us just live in autopilot and

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never really dig deeper and never really find what what

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brings them joy and what they're good at. But I really invite you

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here to do this. And trust me if it's a genuine interest in video

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games. Gosh, there's so much out there you can become a value

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game designer. He can be an advertiser, for video games,

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there's all sorts of things. If your parents don't agree with

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your hobby. That's okay. You Don't need their approval. If it

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is birdwatching, I'm just watching birds right now while I

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speak. And you're so passionately interested in those

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little creatures, then explore your interest there and find

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people to talk about that passion of yours. See, it

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doesn't really matter. What it is, it is how you approach it,

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to meet the right people, and then to excel, what really

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excites you, and to have in mind that you want to share with the

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world, you want to support other people. You want to maybe

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educate other people. You want to help people out, you want to

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inspire people. If you have that intention, you will never fail.

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Maybe you just had the wrong intentions.

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Maybe

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you did what you did, because of a fear of not feeling enough. If

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you didn't do what your parents wanted you to do.

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Maybe

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you're still sad about a breakup, and you're trying to

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run away and that job right now just distracts you enough to not

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think of that pain. So it is uncomfortable at times to sit

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with that feeling. But let me tell you, it's so incredibly

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valuable and worth it. To get to know yourself better. And to

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know what you might want to do in the future can put you in

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such a beautiful mindspace without any help from outside

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without any

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distraction.

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Just by being with yourself.

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Again,

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if you feel too uncomfortable, please reach out and find

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support. But it is normal to feel uncomfortable at times. To

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not being okay, sitting with yourself. And then I hope this

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episode here brought you peace and inspiration and made you

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feel less alone. Thank you so much for listening to the

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Borealis experience. I'm your host Aurora and I will be out