Ep.22 Tools for a clear and open mind [self-care tools ]

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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora, life coach and companion

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on this beautiful journey called life. I hope you're doing well.

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I hope you feel good, I hope you feel loved and understood,

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inspired and expansive. And if that's not the case, if you're

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walking through a dark phase in your life, or if you're having

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a, an off day, I hope I can bring you some value, I hope I

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can make you feel less alone and support it. If ever you want to

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meet in person and engage in a coaching journey, I have a

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physical location now where we can meet in a yard and a forest,

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where I'd love to learn more about your history, your story,

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and then help you out with all the tools I have for you to live

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the most juiciest, courageous, expansive life that you would

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want to imagine for yourself. I'm also happy to connect over

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zoom, if you cannot make it out to the year if you live a little

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bit farther away or abroad. That's always a way to connect

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as well. So and last episodes, I have talked about your mind and

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its addiction to negative thinking anxious thinking

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because it wants to protect you. I also provided a tool on how to

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start out your journey when it comes to becoming a detective.

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Have your thoughts where do they come from? What triggers your

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mind? Or your ego? And how can you become more aware of what's

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true and what is not. So I used words like never, and always

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thoughts that are very radical and one sided. I usually coming

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from a place of anxiety and wanting to protect, but they're

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not always serving us. Yes, they can protect us from potential

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pain, but they can also keep us locked in and small and make us

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feel inadequate and not enough. Even more than we might be

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feeling already. So today I want to keep on going when it comes

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to the tools when it comes to stuff that you can do in order

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to get behind the scenes of your anxious thoughts. And your

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addiction to negative thoughts. So as I just mentioned, the

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first thing is to dis tense yourself from your thoughts and

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to see them as a separate entity. And to ask this entity,

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right really imagining a person sitting on a chair in front of

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you with these thoughts. Hey, where are these thoughts coming

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from? What do you want me to be aware of? What do you want me to

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feel protected? Of? What do you want to protect me? From what is

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threatening? And where's this coming from this so go back to

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your childhood to your teenage years, or maybe to your

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kindergarten days. become curious about where your

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thoughts have first evolved from it's usually an event that was

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painful, disappointing, a wound that hasn't healed yet. And to

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really ask it Hey, what do you want? And what is the opposite

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true? What What if the opposite was true? And it's an

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interesting journey to engage on like I'm I'm still going through

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that right? I'm not fully healed and enlightened and far from

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that. I get in behind my thoughts and my feelings and my

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triggers. And I just wonder Hey, what is this? Did I not take

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enough care of myself today? And I'm just anxious because I'm

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actually thirsty and eager to move my body? Is there really a

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problem and it needs solving? Or what if the opposite was true?

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And to become more playful with this ride to you know we do that

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and exercising? As a physiotherapist I trained

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athlete eats. And you don't only exercise walking forwards and

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sprinting, but also going backwards and crawling on the

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floor. Because you want to keep as agile as possible. So it's

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not only one side at that you train your mind and your body,

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but from all angles from from very diverse places. And so to

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allow your mind to be a little bit more open again, by asking

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questions, is this true? What if the opposite was true? And

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especially when it comes to people, and we have very, you

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know, strong opinions about a certain person in our life that

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is difficult to handle? To also they're like, question, really,

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are they really that annoying? Are they really always this way,

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never that way. That way, you can totally hear relationships

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in your life as well in questioning your assumptions and

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your conclusions that you make about certain people. And and

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can open up conversations that can be very healing. And maybe

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you want that person in your life, but maybe in a different

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way than they used to be in your life. Another thing that you can

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do in order to tackle your negative and anxious thoughts is

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guided meditation, meditation, allowing silence, and being

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mindful. And the first tool that I provided you here is the

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reframing, looking at a situation or a person from a

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different angle. And mindfulness is basically the umbrella of

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reframing. So becoming mindful of your thoughts, becoming

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mindful of your surroundings, really engaging with what is

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going on, right around you. I'm never against cell phones on the

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use of social media or anything. But we need a balance, we need

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to sometimes take a break from our screen, and really deeply

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engage with the environment right around us, be it the

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people becoming more curious about the people around us,

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again, the animals that we take care of, or the animals in our

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environment, if you have plans to spend time with plants, and

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I'm not going to get too esoteric here, but every living

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being deserves your unconditional attention,

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presence and love. And to really engage in that. And to become

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curious about it. curious and open and approaching all living

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beings with an open heart and wanting to know more wanting to

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learn. So mindfulness is an extremely valuable tool on your

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journey to understand your mind, understand your anxiety, or even

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depression, if you struggle with that. And knowing where it's

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coming from and finding out if you can heal that part inside of

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yourself. And being mindful and how you interact with people,

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and how you go about your little habits, how you get out of bed

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in the morning, how you brush your teeth, how you eat, how you

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drink, how you drive, how you speak, and just becoming an

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observant without judgment, because that is you, you are the

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entity that observes you are not your thoughts, you are not the

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activities that you do and all the accomplishments that you you

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know, engage in long form, goals you set yourself to, you are the

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entity that observes all these thoughts, all these behaviors

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are these relationships. And by discerning by going through the

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mind clutter and and really becoming like a little bit more

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radical, a little bit more clear about what you want to allow in

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your mind and what not. And by becoming more aware of yourself

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and your patterns without judgment without harsh judgment.

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You can then change in a way that feels good for you and is

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authentic, but the important thing is when you become more

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and more self aware, to not judge yourself because what we

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tend to do when we start observing ourselves and seeing

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stuff that we don't really like, and we judge it as bad as, you

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know, sociopath as stupid as totally behind times, and

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backwards, I meant sorry. We beat ourselves up to a point

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where we throw everything. We throw everything off the table

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and then quit. This is by the way, what happens with awesome

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new year's resolutions, we are so unrealistic. We are so

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radical and harsh with our new year's resolutions that probably

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by March or latest by now, people have totally given up

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with their New Year's resolution, and maybe even

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gotten worse when it comes to mental health, emotional agility

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and intelligence and physical health. If your goals are too

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unrealistic, or if they are realistic, but you cannot handle

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setbacks and little failures along the way, you will be worse

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off than if you never had new year's resolutions. And same

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goes with you becoming more aware of your thoughts and your

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anxiety and maybe your depression, to ask, Hey, what is

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it that needs to be expressed and and shown to the world? What

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needs to be put on the table? What needs to be said? What

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needs to be experienced? What is it that makes me sad? What is it

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that makes me feel unworthy, unseen and small? And what part

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of my life? In what part of my life did that start? And how can

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we heal this? So reframing questioning your thoughts,

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especially the negative ones, especially the anxious ones and

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detaching from them, knowing that you are not your thoughts,

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your thoughts might be an old software that hasn't gotten

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updated yet. And you're still dragging on and think that it is

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you you identify with your thoughts. Try to observe your

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thoughts without judgment and become more and more aware of

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yourself. And mindfulness. become mindful with everything

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you consume, be it mental content, or physical like food,

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or activities you engage in and become very interested in

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yourself. I was looking for the right word to word here. But

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yeah, become curious and interested about yourself and

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see how that changes your relationship to yourself. And

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then a third thing I want to share with you is self care. The

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better you take care of yourself. And we can start with

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nutrition, adequate water and take vitamins, minerals, micro

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new nutrients and go further into clothing. Are you wearing

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clothing that makes you feel comfortable? Or are you wearing

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clothing that just looks a certain way but actually doesn't

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make you feel good? Your workplace? Is it a space that

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makes you feel good, inspired and creative, expansive and

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loved and appreciated? When it comes to your family or the

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people that you spend time with? Are these people encouraging

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loving, challenging you in the right areas of your life? How do

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you feel overall and then learning to find out what self

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care practices could benefit you? It can be journaling. It

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can be guided meditation. It can be relaxation classes, it can be

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walks in the forest, it can be reading a book, it can be you

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know setting like dates in your calendar where you want to talk

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to loved ones and connect with people around you that you love

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and respect. There's all kinds of self care practices that you

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can engage in. The better you take care of yourself. The more

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positive and pleasant your thoughts and emotions will be

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because overall you feel good and a person that feels good and

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content and enough and seen and heard. Will less likely Do you

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feel inadequate and not enough? And that in turn will positively

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affect their mind and how they perceive the world. All right,

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my dear friend, I think that was a lot for today. I'm going to

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leave you with that. With so much love and always there for

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you if you want to reach out and ask questions if you want to hop

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on a on you know sync up call to see if we want to work together

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in the near future, or for you to request an episode. If there

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is something that you want to learn more about. I'm always

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there for you and happy to serve you in the best way I can. Take

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care. Until next time, bye bye