EP.21 Your worth and feeling unworthy [empowerment]

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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora, life coach and companion

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on this beautiful journey called life. Welcome to the show,

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welcome here, I hope you feel good. I hope you feel safe,

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supported, confident, simply good about yourself. And if you

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don't, I hope I can create a space for you where you feel

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of course, I'm not going to buy a coffee with that money, I'm

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gonna put it right back into the podcast for you, for your mind

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for your heart, for you to feel good. And also offering the

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Borealis experience, nature walks from now on. You can count

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contact me on Facebook. Sorry, I had to clear my throat here. And

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yeah, shoot me a message. If you're curious, I invite people

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to be in nature with me, pour your heart out, rant there vent.

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And then let all your mental and emotional garbage in the forest

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and clear your path to your healing to your success.

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Sometimes we need that neutral person that we can talk to.

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Because especially if you live in a small community, it is very

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hard at times to be yea open with the people around you

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because you're scared of judgment, you're scared of them

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starting to treat you differently once you open up.

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And yeah, I just want to be that person in the southern Alberta

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community for now. Where you can just come and spend some time in

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nature and pour your heart out. Of course, I'm offering this to

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our people around the world who are interested. But yeah, when

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it comes to distance, we would have to meet over zoom. But in

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the future, I will also be traveling to your place to your

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city to hold workshops. If there is any requests. I'm open to

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that I want to serve more people and make sure that yeah, we are

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all doing all right and good, if not fabulous out there. Alright

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enough with my chatter. Today, I want to call it the self worth

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session. self worth, I feel we all have an attachment to having

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to accomplish things in order to feel worthy, and I don't know

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when it all started. It must be, you know, rooted in our families

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that we have to be a good girl we have to be a good boy in

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order to belong and be part of society and specially have a

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family. So we have to do certain deeds in order to feel

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accomplished in order to feel worthy. The problem now is if

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you closely connect your worth to an outcome of an activity or

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to another person judging your performance, so to say like Do

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you see what the problem is there like you are making

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yourself very vulnerable to other people's judgments,

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expectations, and especially to your own yet. It's not always

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other people

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Who put expectations on us, sometimes the harshest

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expectations come from ourselves. Let me give you some

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examples here, let's pretend that you were born into an

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academic family. Turns out though, that you are a badass

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artist, he loved the arts, you love to express yourself through

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music, movie, acting, colors and paintings. And the academics is,

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yeah, it's an interesting field for you, but you're not

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passionate about you, you are passionate about the arts. And

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it can be very different to like you can be born into an artistic

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family and being the only academic person and they're so

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we feel ostracized, we feel weird, about our passion, we

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don't feel understood. And yet, if we start following our

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passion, we will feel as if our family is not supporting us,

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because you are starting a new path. So you're gonna be linking

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your worth, to how much the people around you approve of

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your decisions, and how happy you make them in taking certain

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decisions. So you put yourself out there and believe that your

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worth is deeply attached to an outcome to the way you perform.

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And that is very dangerous. Can you imagine a world where your

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worse would be? Impeccable, untouched. No one could ever

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challenge it, not even yourself. You are out there, you're trying

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out new things you are putting yourself out there and risking

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rejection. And then you face failure, obstacles and

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rejection, which is perfectly normal as an entrepreneur and

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normal person. Every person goes through that. But your worth is

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being crippled. You feel as if your worth is diminishing, the

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more you encounter, struggle and difficult situations. And what

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I'm here to tell you today is that your worth can't be touched

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or diminished. Imagine it being a seed, a beautiful plant,

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growing and nourishing, fertile soil. And it is growing in an in

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an environment where it's protected from negative sought

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doubt, harsh judgments expectations that little plant

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can just grow and be itself. So by envisioning your worse by

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kind of taking it out of your system outside of you, and

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putting it into the palm of your hand for instance and if you're

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having a hard time imagine imagining this just pretend for

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a second that you can take your worth your preciousness, your

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new uniqueness into your hands and then I want you to look at

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it with the most sweetest, tender eyes with the most

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respect that you can feel for something outside of you. And

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know that from today on nobody and nothing can touch you're

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worse. You also cannot add to it you know some people think oh I

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need diamonds. I need bikes. I need clothing. I need

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accomplishments because this is when my worth is bigger. No this

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is not how it goes.

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It's just like makeup you know like so often we see women who

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wear tons of makeup and we simply don't understand because

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they're so absolutely gorgeous. Yet they feel the need to having

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to wear makeup but it is an inside job that they do. Don't

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feel worthy. And the same thing goes for guys. The more you are

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trying to feel worthy is through external stuff, likes, comments,

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on Facebook, on social media, or whatever it is that approves of

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you, or throws a thumbs up or a love heart at you. The more you

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make yourself dependent, and you kind of put your power into the

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outside world, and that is not okay, because the outside world

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is pretty unpredictable and pretty scary. And I don't want

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you to be hiding now. But what I want you to do is to not make

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your worth dependent on your outside world, just simply

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imagine you are in your 30s, your plus 30, male, female,

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freshly divorced, or never been married, you have no children,

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or you have children and they don't want to see you. And all

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of a sudden you feel worthless because of these circumstances.

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Yeah, believe or see that if you're born into a family that

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expects you to have children by the age of 22, and you have to

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have a running marriage and a house and a garden full of

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beautiful flowers. Yet you are not living up to that. Are you

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supposed to feel like a piece of shit? Are you supposed to feel

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worthless and hide behind addictions behind self health

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books? No, do not give your power away. Your worth is with

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you is within you. And nothing and no one can touch it. And if

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you're 65 and still have no children and all your siblings

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around you and your cousins have tons of children and happy

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marriages. So what if you are crippled by this expectation

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towards yourself and by other people, you're not only

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crippling your soul, you are also not going to show up in

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society as the person we need you to be. You are so worthy of

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being listened to, you are so worthy of feeling seen. And you

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also have kind of a duty to be out there and to kick ass in

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whichever way you want. The more authentically you express

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yourself, they're more happy you are with your job, the more

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valuable you are to society, and not by abiding to some weird

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expectations that you simply can't fulfill because they're

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not in alignment with your True Nature. But by being your true

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self, wanting to be out there to serve your community, and to

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shine a light that inspires others to do the same, who still

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feel stuck and crippled by their own expectations, and by their

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feelings of unworthiness. All right, I'm going to leave you

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with that. I love you so much. I care so deeply about you. I'm so

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happy you're here. I appreciate you so much. Because if you

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listen to this, it means that you want a change for the

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better. You want to grow. You want to make peace with your

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past and not be a victim anymore. And you want to show up

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in your community as yourself no matter what. And trust me if you

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have a good heart, if you have good intentions. You will feel

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as if you're jumping into a cold ocean and swim in waters that

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you've never tested

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before, but people will support you and cheer for you. And I

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will be the first out there who routes for you. Alright, I hope

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I was able to kick your ass in the most graceful and kindness

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way. take really good care of yourself. And I will be out