Ep. 16 How to feel less anxious [self-care, self-awareness]

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Hello, Hello and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host, Aurora, lash coach and companion

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on this beautiful journey called life. Thank you so much for

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being here. Thank you so much for spending some time with me

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today for putting some time aside for yourself to reflect

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about your self, your behaviors, your decisions. My slogan, maybe

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you know it already, maybe you're new to the show is the

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better you know yourself, the better decisions you're gonna

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make and the more fulfilled and content you're going to be in

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your life, the stronger your relationships will be. And who

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does not want that. Unfortunately, we're not born

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with a manual. So when we grow up, parents do their best to

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their abilities. And when we are adults, yeah, we also follow,

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believes, and believe and things that we think are right. But

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sometimes they're not really in alignment with our true self.

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And when we engage on these paths that are not into

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alignment with ourselves, we can feel confused, lost stuck, we

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can become sick, even not only in the mind, but in the body. So

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what I'm trying to do here is to reconnect you to yourself,

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remind you of who you are, and provide you with tools that I

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was given. When I felt lost and disconnected and stuck. So I

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want to make your life easy. Make you live to see and I want

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you to live your true purpose. Today I want to talk about

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anxiety and how to be less anxious. Why do I feel I can

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talk about anxiety? Because? Well, you guessed it, right. I'm

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struggling with anxiety. And I think we all do. To some degree,

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I'm not a special case, I'm not unique. We all have anxiety. At

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some point in our lives. Sometimes it is anxiety that

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comes up in social settings. Sometimes we feel anxious

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because we're just yeah, not liking our situation. Sometimes

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we're anxious because something happened in our life that

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overwhelms us. So I have felt called to talk about it today.

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And I'm hoping that I can make you feel less alone and even

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give you tools that can make you feel better when you feel

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anxious. You might not hear it in my voice right now. But I'm

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having an extremely anxious day today. Something happened in my

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life. And yeah, I can share with you what it is because I want to

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protect the members of my community. And it also doesn't

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really matter once anxiety is there. Your mind is in the

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future and is concerned with what is. And that is not an

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awesome state to be in for too long. You can feel it in your

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body, you're tensed. Maybe your eye movement is faster than

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usual. Your breath might be short and shallow. You might be

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short with the people around you. Impatient, angry. Yeah,

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anxiety can really show up in very different ways. There's

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some people who are totally shutting down when they're

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anxious. They're like, paralyzed. They are numb, they

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can move to a certain degree. They're losing flexibility, they

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feel discomfort all over their body. So it is really different

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how everybody experience anxiety and I want to make you aware

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that I'm not a doctor, I'm not a counselor. So if you struggle

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with deep anxiety, I encourage you to reach out to a

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professional and to ask for help because there's really good

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doctors out there who can help you out What I'm helping with is

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the mild anxieties that we

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struggle with on a daily basis, but that are not, you know,

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we're not causing harm to ourselves or to others, we're

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still functioning. But we feel uncomfortable in our skin. So

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what I did today is that I first checked in with my body. Am I

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sleeping? Well, in the last recent days, sleep, as you might

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know, for me already is always the first thing I address with

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my personal trainer, clients and my coaching clients because it

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deeply affects your mental and physical state. So I was very

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confident in answering this question with a firm. No, I

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haven't been sleeping well, these last couple of days.

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Alright, let's move on to the next. Have I been eating

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properly today? Yes, I did. I had wonderful breakfast, and now

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I had a great lunch. We move forward to water intake tech. Am

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I dehydrated or well hydrated. If your body is dehydrated, it

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can signal you thirst by becoming anxious by becoming

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nervous. Also, headaches can come up. And other symptoms.

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Alright, I drank enough water. What else is going on? Did I

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exercise today? Yes, I followed my daily yoga routine. And I

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felt really good doing it. Did something else happen today?

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Yes, I got news that were certainly not pleasant. So here

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we go. It was a trigger from the outside. It is thoughts that

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this trigger avalanched out of my mind, my brain. And my monkey

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mind is running free with these sorts of feeling unsafe,

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feeling? Uncertainty, feeling anxious, and what if scenarios,

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if not worst case scenarios. All right, so we're getting a little

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bit closer here. It is my mind that is just running wild. And

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then I tried to rein it back in. I was trying to relative aid. I

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don't know if you say that in English and German you say

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relative aid the situation. So basically, I was trying to boil

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the situation down to what it comes down to. I'm still not

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going to disclose what the news were, but we're going to work

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with this. Next, I was inviting myself to go for a walk. I know

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that going for a walk out in nature with my dogs always

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brings me back to my center. So I engaged in that walk. And

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after that walk, I could feel a drastic change already. I was

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not totally able to rein in my mind. Completely, but just my

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body. Walking in a calm space being surrounded by green, lush

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leaves and grass and having my dogs close by and watching my

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dogs enjoying themselves gave me enormous peace already. The next

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thing I've done and this is called future pacing is that am

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I imagined myself tonight, talking to my boyfriend in front

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of a fireplace, about his day and deeply listening to him. We

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have little ritual that when we come home, we have some time for

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ourselves beard shower, not sometimes we don't have time for

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ourselves and we we talk right away about how our day was and

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share all the dirty details with each other and this is just

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extremely beautiful because even though you are apart.

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At the end of the day, you feel like you were with the other

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person and they bring a certain energy back home and share it

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with you and you do the same with them. It is extremely

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common for me. Now if you don't have a partner, if you live by

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yourself, then I invite you to imagine a super peaceful

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situation that you want to see yourself and in a couple hours

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down the road. Maybe you want to watch your favorite movie, and

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you really really open up your heart and let all this good

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energy flow into you and flush out your discomfort and anxiety.

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Maybe you want to prepare a super meal for yourself. And you

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want to make it really fancy and kind of celebrate yourself.

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Maybe you want to call a friend, you want to connect with a loved

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one and hear them out hear about their day here, but the last

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couple of weeks. So again, listening to a person and to

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their experience of life, zooming out of your experience,

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of course, without making it, you know, trying to overly

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distract from yourself, but to open up to another person and

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hear them out can be super relaxing, and soothing. All

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right, I'm going to repeat once again, my little tools that I

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use first, I check in with my body, am I giving my body

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everything that it needs? Second, I tried to be a little

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detective and find out when did my anxiety kick start? What was

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the trigger? I go back to that point, and then decide, okay,

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what am I going to do with myself now I want to engage in

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activities that make me feel good. In order to do that, you

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have to know yourself, you have to become a master and knowing

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what makes you feel great. And you can go back in time. And go

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through all the little activities that really make you

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feel genuinely great and that are good habits to engage in and

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Mike case it was going for a walk. In my case, it is going to

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be that I'm going to zoom myself into the future and picture a

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peaceful evening where I know I will be safe. I will be able to

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listen to my partner and my partner will hear me out if you

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don't have a partner again. Find something that brings you joy,

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get a movie, be at cooking for yourself being connecting with a

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friend over the phone. All right. The last thing I want to

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encourage you to do if, like me, you haven't been sleeping well.

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In the last couple of days before becoming anxious, I

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encourage you to have a nap. And sometimes that's odd, because

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you haven't practice having a nap. Maybe. Yeah, you're not

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tired right now because you're anxious. But just lay down in a

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safe place on the floor on a couch in your bed. Put something

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on top of your eyes and see what happens. Sometimes, this can

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help you to fall asleep and a couple moments time. And

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sometimes your mind is just too racy, and you don't want to do

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it. But I encourage you to try it out. Because napping just 20

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minutes a day can really work wonders is way better than

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having a coffee in the afternoon because that can also affect

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your sleep at night. So try napping if napping is not an

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option. Try to go for a walk. The gentle smooth movement of

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your body in turn can affect your mind that is racing an

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anxious in a very good and soothing way. All right. I'm

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gonna leave you with this. If you enjoyed this episode, please

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don't hesitate to share with loved ones, if you want to help

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them out in the future.

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If you want to show appreciation for receiving my podcast episode

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here, all free, no sponsors. I'm doing it all. And you want to

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buy me a coffee. There's a link in the show notes. Buy me a

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coffee. And I would greatly appreciate your level of Thank

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you. And if you have the time read or review the podcast on

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Apple podcasts. It means a lot to me. It's the biggest currency

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out there for podcasters to be seen by more people and yeah, I

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want to make sure that I can help as many people as possible

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with my podcast here. So on the snot, I'm gonna let you go. take

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really good care of yourself and I will be out there very soon

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again.