Ep.33 The power you have over other people.

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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora. And I'm so grateful to

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have you here today that we can spend some time together. Today

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I want to talk about mental health and why it is important,

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so important to me to do this podcast, I had really good

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feedback so far. And this is only motivating me to do more.

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And I really hope I can bring you peace and resolution and

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hope and just good feelings into your life. Especially during

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COVID COVID has been very, very hard on many people. Alcohol

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consumption is skyrocketing domestic violence, depression,

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loneliness, addictions in generals are going through the

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roof, in Europe, as well as in North America. And seeing those

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numbers just motivates me even more to do what I'm doing here.

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So thank you so, so much for supporting me for listening and

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sharing and subscribing. It's been an incredible four weeks

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now.

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So thank

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you so much for your support. So mental health has been a topic

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in my life for quite some time now. I would say five years. And

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before that, I only saw my body and my thoughts. I thought my

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body. Yeah, it's just my body. As a woman, you're always

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unhappy with what you have, you want a different you want to,

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like the woman in the advertisement or in the movies,

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went through some eating disorders and my teens and

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recovered from that would say it's always been a companion,

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this eating disorder and now kind of it's fading out of my

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life. There's no more shame around eating, and I feel at

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ease and peace with my body. And then my thoughts. Yeah, I was a

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pretty ego driven woman that went through a lot of pain in

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her 20s. I was raped when I was 21. And that severely changed my

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relationship to men in general. And not as someone would think

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that I was avoiding men and trying to, I don't know, be all

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independent. Also. No, that was not the case. I was in couple

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relationships. Were looking back now I can see that. I was not

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myself. I was fear driven. I was ego driven. I was manipulative.

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And I could only see it now, looking back and being in it.

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Back then was just a huge show. For my partner, and for myself,

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but I couldn't make sense of it. I couldn't see it. And I decided

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to leave my home country then. And to immigrate to Canada to

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live with my grandmother on her farm here in the Rocky

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Mountains. Because I needed to find what was going on with

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myself and being all by myself out here.

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Really,

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yeah, was harsh and hard. And I went through so much depressive

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phases, so much depression, and so much pain and loneliness. But

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it helped me to see to finally see what was going wrong with

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me. And I'm not there yet. I hope you know that I will never

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stand above anybody else or above you listening. I will

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stand right next to you because I'm not better off than anybody.

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I just learned to see and learn a couple things, and about

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myself. And those are the things that I want to share with the

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world. Because it helped me enormously along my way and I

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want to help people to find these tools that I found for

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myself, way sooner than I did. It took me over 10 years and I

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feel a person could do so much faster than I did. So that's my

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contribution to this world. And this is why I decided to do this

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podcast because I can reach beautiful people all around the

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world. And listening to a podcast is deeply soothing, you

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can connect with that person, you can resonate with the

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content, and really let things settle down. And you can listen

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to the podcast while you're walking while you're driving.

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While you're half asleep, or white, when you wake up in the

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morning, of course, the meditations I never recommend to

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do while you're driving a bicycle or a car or operating

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machinery. But when I talk like that, you can just do whatever

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you want, in the meantime. So mental health and especially

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mental health for men, is so important for me to address

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because along my journey, I recognized that I was capable of

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doing tremendous harm, just by living in fear and ego. And what

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do I mean by that? A woman or a person who is living in her

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femininity, when hurt, can be so manipulative, and passive

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aggressive. And those two things alone are enough to reflect

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about yourself about what I reflected about myself. And what

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scared me so much. Because up until then, I was always blaming

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the other person, I was always thinking, Oh, my God, the other

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person is just not my match. And it's just not there yet, and

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just not ready. But I never looked at the work that I would

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have to do, and that I would have to let go off. And it is so

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sobering lets you know, that you were in charge of your luck and

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your happiness all along. But it's also tremendously

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empowering. Because when you find the right people to talk

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about, and when you find maybe guides, or really good books,

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then you really know that you're not alone in this. And you don't

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need to live in sadness and regret, but you can take control

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over your happiness and make better decisions. And self love

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has been a really important thing along my journey, and

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accepting myself for how I look and how I feel and my past. And

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in working on that I was becoming a better person, I was

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relating to other people in a more healthier way, and was able

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to express myself in a better way. So I believe strongly that

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if we take good care of ourselves, then we can be better

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people, in our community, in our society. And in being that

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person, we make society so much stronger. And for ourselves, we

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make our life

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so much more enjoyable. So when it comes to men, because, yeah,

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I had one episode now for men only, but I feel and I know

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myself, and that there will be much more. It is not that I'm

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not interested in women's mental health. I think to some part,

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you cannot really separate it anyways. But mental health for

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men, is so critical for me to talk about because I feel

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there's such a strong stigma around it among men. And I can

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only change how I behave in society. So I want to give women

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tools and maybe some insights about men's mental health, in

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order to have better relationships and doesn't have

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to be romantic. It can be friendship or siblings. It can

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be acquaintances, or relationships, but men really

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are taught to suck things up way more than women. Women are way

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more open to talk about their pain, and encourage each other

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to talk about their pain. And among men, it is not the case.

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And I live in Alberta, in Canada. And there has been a

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phase here, ever since I moved here where the suicide among

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young guys was so high, and it was so scary because I could see

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why they would do it. But you, you don't know how to stop it.

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When you first hear these numbers, you are just scared?

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And you don't know. Yep, well, I don't have influence on that

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anyways, and I think you have, I think every single person has a

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deep impact on to another person he or she interacts with. And if

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we can be more sensitive with each other and more. I love to

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say cutting through the bullshit. So more aware of what

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is going on, then that would be such a beautiful shift to say,

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to see in our society. I've heard way too many people in my

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life and I know I can't take that pain from those lovely

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people away, I disappointed many people. Too many people, you

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know, maybe it's just two or three people. But that's three

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too many. And I know why I did it. And it was simply because I

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was not aware of how much power one person has over the other.

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And if you become aware over the power you have on others and

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duty we have to show up out there and to be authentic, then

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I find it can only be empowering and good. So this is my mission

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and my vision here with the Borealis podcast. I will share

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way more about my journey. And I will share way more tools to

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help you guide yourself into smoother waters. And I'm very

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excited to have you on this journey with me and sending all

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my love out to you. Be gentle on yourself. Bye bye