Ep.39 Be you. Fearlessly. [motivation]

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Hello, hello, and welcome to the Borealis

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experience. I'm your host Aurora, and I'm very happy to be

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spending some time with you today.

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I'm a personal coach. And I want to create a space for you where

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you can feel safe and recharge your batteries and maybe change

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your perspective on certain things. If not, even yourself.

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Be you

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fearlessly. It is time to be more authentic.

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You've been hiding behind a mask you've been hiding, because of

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social pressures. Maybe because it was more convenient in the

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moment to not show your real face your real emotions.

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Sometimes we also feel the need to hide because

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we think that the people around us don't really deserve to see

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our real face.

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But isn't it exhausting? Aren't you tired?

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I find it

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real really difficult, at times to speak my truth and to be

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fearlessly me. Because I want to fit in because I don't want to

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inconvenience other people, because I don't want to create

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friction.

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But there's a fine, very graceful way of being yourself

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without offending others. And this is what I want to talk

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about today.

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There's a way you can communicate and shine your light

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without hurting others. And sometimes we just think Yeah, we

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don't have any talents. We're not add artists, we have no real

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way to express ourselves authentically so that other

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people can understand us better. But we all have that voice

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inside of us that soul that is craving to express itself.

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And it is that craving that should push you forward

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to be yourself and that craving not only feels like a strong

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desire, but sometimes it is physical pain.

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Sometimes, we held ourselves in a very tight little prison

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self made

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and our body starts to ache because we are conforming to a

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life that might not be the right life

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for us.

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So that's what I'm here to to share with you today is how

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important it is to be fearlessly you.

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Because it can make you sick,

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physically sick, mentally sick, emotionally sick. If you learn

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to perfectly suppress your desires or your true authentic

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self.

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And the way I've learned now to express myself more

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authentically

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is to talk how I feel about things

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and to really be in tune with my body

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and to then put it into words

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and it takes some training it takes some time to to listen to

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your body again because most of us learned very nicely how to

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put a sticker on the engine light

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the repair your truck light and to ignore the signals from our

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body

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like we do for our cars at times.

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But it is just

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a real relearning. You used to know how to listen to your body

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look at children, how they just express themselves without

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thinking without

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by

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reflecting about how it would make other people feel,

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and yet children do is very recklessly and, you know, you

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have to guide them a little bit on how to, yeah, express their

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feelings in a way that people want to listen and want to

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accommodate. But that's something that you can learn as

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well.

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But what I've learned is, when you express your feelings,

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then the other person is inclined to listen, when you

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start blaming, and then shaming other people, for how you feel.

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People shut down right away and don't want to listen, don't want

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nothing to do with you, because they see you and feel you as a

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victim. And yeah, you truly behave like one too, if you give

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the power over two external circumstances, or people.

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So I feel there's a stigma around us on how men, for

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instance, don't like to talk about their feelings. And women

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always want men to talk about their feelings.

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And I kind of want to break through this, I want to give

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people peace with that, because what women actually crave, when

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they say that is a raw connection to you.

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They want to know how you function, they want to know how

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you think and how you feel and where your boundaries are. And

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it's not always about Whoo, I feel so attracted to you and all

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I feel so awesome with you

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know, sometimes it's, Oh, I feel uncomfortable when you do this.

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And I get it, it is tough to express negative feelings

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without any big emotions. Because we fear the reaction

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from

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the other person nevertheless. So when we are strongly

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emotional and you know, burst out, then we know, Okay, fuck,

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the other person is going to do the same and explode. At the

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same time, when we learn to express ourselves in a very calm

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and, you know, mature way, we're still incredibly scared of how

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the other person might react. And we have to learn that this

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reaction is perfectly normal and has everything to do with the

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other person. And if the other person wants to build bridges

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with you, instead of wolves, they will kind of surrender to

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your courageous way of expressing yourself now. So for

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instance,

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if my boyfriend is pissed off with something, and

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just, you know, blames and shames me for not doing the

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dishes, or not taking care of my truck enough.

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I feel like yeah, I don't really want to listen, I know, he wants

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me to do the things differently. But yeah,

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it doesn't really bother me to a point that I will change my

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behavior.

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If my boyfriend now comes up and says, Hey, you know what they,

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if you don't take care of your truck, you might be facing

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consequences that can cost you lots of money. Or if we don't do

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the dishes, right after dinner.

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I feel like we're, yeah, not leaving the kitchen in a state

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that it feels nice to come back to. And I love our little

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kitchen. And I love when it's nice and tidy. And we start to

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cook our new meal here in a couple of hours.

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You see how all of a sudden

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the other prisoners taking ownership and expresses that in

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a very calm way. And now all of a sudden, I want to listen now

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I'm like, Yeah, of course I want my boyfriend to feel

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comfortable. So I'm going to do my best and change my behavior.

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So

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I hope this little example was was making it clear on how you

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can influence people and make people change their behavior in

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expressing yourself calmly and authentically.

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And if I was to, you know, burst out and react aggressively to

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his

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recommendation suggestion or how he fields

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It is all about me and he has not to react to it, he can just

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walk away. Or tell me, Hey, I'm gonna talk to you when you calm

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down, because

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this is not the

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way I want to communicate with you.

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So you actually take your power back, when you express yourself,

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honestly and fearlessly. And it's incredible how it changes

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your relationships, your immediate relationships, but

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also the relationships at work or with strangers.

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Just imagine yourself, not reacting anymore to weird

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situations or people that trigger you, but to respond in a

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way that is true to your heart, true to your soul. And also

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awesome for your mind. Because you know, you're standing your

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ground, you are in alignment with your values. And you are

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just expressing yourself with the other person

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to the other person, or however you say that in English.

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So I hope this all makes sense. And I really encourage you to

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try this out within the next week or 10 days, and then give

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me feedback on how it went. You change your behavior, and you

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will see that other people will change their behavior with you

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as well for the better. So I'm burning to know how it goes for

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you and to talk about it further.

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And yeah, never hesitate to connect with me on Facebook,

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Aurora Eggert coaching or Aurora Eggert. And yeah, just drop the

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line message me and say, Yeah, you're listening to my podcast

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and you'd like to

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connect with me. There's a lot of scammers out there. So I

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usually don't reply to just a hey, and hello, how are you?

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So, yeah, I'm I'm really curious about this. And if you want to

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meet up if you want to have a one on one coaching session, the

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first session is for free 60 minutes where I hear you out and

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find out where you're at and

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let you know how I can help you. And yeah, then we go from there.

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take really good care of yourself and try it out. Try to

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be authentic and calm and very confident with how you feel. And

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it will change your life for sure. Thank you so much for

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listening to my episode here. If you liked my content, please

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make sure to hop on to Apple podcast and leave a review and

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share with friends and family if you care about their well being

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and want them to be on a on a better path or a good pass. All

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right. I'll be up there really soon again.

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Tell them